Round Two?

So, I realize that I never actually updated after my half ironman. The reason is that I was crushed. I should probably start this off with a race report......

June9, 2012: Boise 70.3 The day began cold. Really cold. I was up early, and my brother met me at the bike/run transition to drop my running gear and to get me on the bus that would take me to the starting line. My brother rocks, I seriously adore him. He has done the Boise 70.3 3 times, so I consider him a veteran, and it was so calming to have him there to hold my hand through the process, It really helped to calm my nerves! I had to get on the bus alone, but the ride helped me to begin focusing.

The Start/Swim: As I mentioned above, the day started out cold. By the time the race began, the temperature was 35 degrees. I had been waiting in my wetsuit(as had every other participant), but my bare feet were so frozen that they had literally turned grey and I could no longer feel them. After the race, I would discover several cuts that I was clueless as to how I got them. About 10 minutes before the professionals started, the announcement was made that the bike was being shortened because of the crazy bad weather. It was so windy out there that the aid tents were being blown over, and so cold that there was a very real threat of hypothermia. I wanted to cry. Several people didn't even bother to start the race(and several more people were pulled from the swim because of hypothermia, it was awful). As the start time for my wave came near, I got onto the cement slab that was our starting point. I was able to watch the first of the pros exit the water, which was so awesome because I have never been able to see it before. The wave before me went, and we were allowed to wade into the water. Aaahhh! Sweet relief! The water was actually several degrees warmer(around 60+) than the air outside! At the "GO", I started off with several other women. It was my first time in a mass swim start, and it was quite unnerving. I had done several open water swims, but never with dozens of other people. I am not the fastest swimmer, so I was also being passed by people from all the waves behind me. I really struggled on the swim because of this. However, I finished my swim with a time of 1:06, which was only 12 minutes longer than I had estimated my time would be. It was the first time I had done 1.2 miles in the open water, but I felt good, and wasn't even the last person out of the water, woo hoo!!

Bike: I used the wetsuit pullers to help me out of my wetsuit because my hands were so cold that I just couldn't do it. Oh yeah, there is a line of people waiting for you as you exit the swim to help you get out of your wetsuit. Probably one of the coolest things about the race! My transition time was awful, but I was finally able to get all my gear together and get out on my bike. I ran my bike to the line where I could finally hop on, only to discover that my chain had dropped! I was so cold and confused that I couldn't comprehend this, and I just stared at my bike. Finally a spectator asked me if I knew how to fix it. This finally snapped me out of it, because yes, I did in fact know how to fix it, I just hadn't been able to get my muddled brain to think. I fixed my chain(it was super easy and took only seconds), and I was off! I felt really good on the bike as I was able to get my body moving enough to start to thaw out. I downed water and a few Honey Stinger Waffles because I wanted to get to the run well hydrated and with some energy. My amazing husband and three kids were out on the bike course with signs to cheer me on. I have never been so happy during a race!! I finally came down the hill to the bike/run transition, I only had a half marathon to run, and the sun was almost shining!

Run: My transition to the run was more smooth than onto the bike, but I still struggled with severely cold feet and hands, which made things a bit slow. My parents were there at the transition to cheer me. I am so lucky to have such a supportive family. I was finally off on the run. I did my first mile in 9:45 which is a record setting pace for me! I am always faster off of the bike, and it seems so easy. Then, reality sets in, and I slow down. All in all, I managed an overall pace of 11:19/mile, which I am super duper happy with. All along the course, I was seeing TriTown jerseys(the group that i had trained with, and the only triathlon store in Idaho, they are super amazing). I did my first loop, stopping at every aid station for Poweraide, and to use the bathroom since I was so over hydrated. Near the end of the first loop, the gang from TriTown(owners, workers, and friends), were there to cheer me on and give out high fives. It was so nice to see the support from non family too. I made it to the turn around, and started on the last leg of my adventure. I was tired, but in good spirits as I knew the end was finally coming! I continued my pattern of drinking and peeing at every aid station, though I probably could have/should have switched to water. I hit one spot where I was able to see a fellow TriTown athlete(Dennis), who has been a great inspiration to me. He wasn't far behind, and it was comforting to know that there were others out there with me still, as the bulk of the athletes were finishing their race as I was just hitting the turn around. On the last long stretch, Antonio(one of the TriTown owners) rode along with me on his bike. His encouraging words gave me an extra burst of speed that was much needed at this point. Then he headed off to find Dennis. I rounded the last turn, and the TriTown crew was STILL there to cheer me on!! I seriously cannot believe the support I got from them, hanging out there until the last of the tritown group finished, no matter how long it took. I could see the finish line, and I gave it all had, I wanted to finish strong as I knew my family would be there to see me. Unfortunately, I did get beat by a few feet by an 82 year old participant(in my defense, he had been doing this for several years, I had not!!)

The Finish: Crossing the finish line was such a thrilling and bittersweet moment. I was so happy to be done, and yet still felt the weight of not having actually completed the half ironman distance. I got my heat blanket, my finishers medal, and most importantly, my son slipped his little hand in mine, and held on tight. I was able to go get some delicious food, and sit down for a few minutes to talk with my family. The weather then took another turn for the worse, and it got super windy and overcast again(it had been windy the whole day, but this got ridiculous once more). I went to gather up my transition bags, and was able to sit and stretch out while my wonderful husband went and got the van. It was such an amazing experience, and worth all the blood, sweat, and tears that were put into it. Which brings me to the title of this post. I have been contemplating doing the Boise 70.3 again in 2013. I do not feel like I have done a half ironman yet. I know, I know, I finished the race, but the bike was cut, so I didn't actually finish a full half ironman. I have been so crushed by this that I have thrown away all my training, and undone all the hard work I put into it in the first place. I am so mad at myself, but I also needed it. So, I came here to write this, and to get back on the wagon(again). I haven't 100% decided that I am doing it, but probably 85% decided. I will have to see if I can arrange babysitting for the Monday night Swims, and the Saturday swim/bike. I took lot of commitment from a lot of different people to get me to the starting line. I know that if I want this bad enough though, that I will make it happen once again.

Weight loss results

Well, I expected a lot more weight loss while training for my half ironman. After talking with several people, I have learned that so many people don't lose weight while training for strenuous events because your body needs to focus on fueling, not losing. So true!! However, here are my results. I lost 15.4lbs since January 1st! I lost several inches, though I didn't really keep track. I did go down two pant sizes, which rocked my socks off. I am healthier now than I have ever been in my entire life. My husband commented that he saw the biggest change in my body when I started riding longer distances on my bike(I was riding 50-60 miles each weekend). I am 16.8 pounds away from my goal weight, and I am happy with where my muscle is. I can actually SEE muscle on my body, it's so cool!! 5 more days to go until I found out if I have what it takes to be a half ironmom!

Getting back on track

Just in time for a road trip. This is definitely going to be a challenge! I am finally picking my lazy butt up and getting back on track with my training. I still have a little junk in my chest, but honestly, it doesn't really seem to affect me while i exercise, so I should be good.

The opportunity came up for me to go down and see a good friend while the kids are on spring break, so I decided to do it. It's a good 14 hour drive with a 5 year old, a 3 year old, and a 17 month old, what am I thinking?!? I'm not bringing my bike, but I am bringing my running clothes, and I'll be able to do my strength training while I'm there because it doesn't really require any equipment. My dear friend has also agreed to let me invade her kitchen so that I am able to stay on track with our 100 day real food challenge. I'm packing a cooler with healthy foods for the kids and I to eat on the way down there so we won't have to eat any fast food. I'm so excited, and it makes it even better to have a friend to support me and encourage me while I am on a relaxing(hopefully) trip.

Another challenge

It's no secret that I am struggling with my motivation. I'd rather sleep in an extra few minutes than get my full bike time in, or step into the frosty morning to run. I'd rather sit on the couch than go swimming at night. I'm just plain tired.

So, I decided(with the full support of my husband because this has a huge impact on him), to do a 100 days of real food challenge. No processed foods, no sugars, no white flour, no artificial anything, etc. The list is quite intense. We started this morning. The husband and I are going hard core, but will be a bit more lenient with the kids, especially while they are at school(parents bring the snacks for the oldest preschool, and the school district provides that snacks for my son). Plus, the youngest two are having their adenoids out on Tuesday, and there were promises of Popsicles and ice cream to sooth sore throats. I want them to be spoiled at their Nana's house(within reason), and not have to inconvenience her. So, for the kids, it means that within reason and while I am in control, they will be doing this challenge too.

I have already been moving this direction, though I haven't been super strict with it. I think it's time for me to buckle down and really focus. If I am putting effort into improving my health, I really need to focus on my whole body, not just getting moving. What I fuel my body with has an incredible impact on my health, and it's time I really paid attention to that. I want to be healthy, and I want my kids to be healthy. I believe that what we put into our bodies has a huge impact on our health. Food from a box is convenient, but not necessarily healthy.

Sickness

Ugh, I feel like I've been sick for weeks. Oh wait, I have been! And not just me, but the kids too. Especially the youngest. She's been scary sick lately. As if my motivation wasn't already down in the dumps, being sick and taking care of three sick kids puts me at about my breaking point.

I took a week off from training, and then this past week has been shortened workouts. It's hard to run when you're hacking up green junk. I also realize that I am using this as an excuse. I will use anything I can. I start out all sorts of excited to do something, but as the race date approaches, I lose my motivation, my willpower, my drive. I think I am just so used to sabotaging myself that it comes naturally now.

At least I am down about 12 pounds, and several inches. I may post another picture soon. Then again, I may not. I can see muscle definition in my legs and my arms, and it's pretty darn cool. I can honestly say that I have never been this fit and muscular before, which seems so strange because I used to be thin before having kids. But being thin doesn't equal being fit. I'm currently in the best shape of my life, and it's only getting better.

I'm lame.

There is no other excuse for not posting.

Yeah, I started this post a few days ago, and still never posted it. L-A-M-E.

On a more positive note....




days until Boise Ironman 70.3!

My training is coming along, I am happy with it. Nervous that I won't be ready, but that's always a fear of mine.

Today I am 30.

I got up this morning at 5:05am. Okay, I set my alarm for 5:05am, and grudgingly slithered out of bed at 5:16am. I didn't actually make it out the door until 5:40am though, after downing a cup of 2% milk and half a banana. I ran a new route this morning, well, half of it was new, and half of it was old. I needed to add an extra mile to my run, so I meandered a little differently today. I really like running through quiet neighborhoods early in the morning. I can hear my footfalls, and it's so relaxing. I ran slower than I anticipated, but that's okay. I kept my heartrate right around 150, until the last half mile or so when I had to get home before my husband left for work(though I got home exactly when he was supposed to leave, just to find him stepping out of the shower, running late). All in all, it was a good way to start the day.

Sh** Happens

And there isn't always anything you can do about it. I've got some non triathlon crap going on in my life, and I have been letting it affect my half ironman training. Okay, not just affect it, but destroy it. I originally blamed it on the wicked nasty cold I got the day after it all went down. Fair enough, I could hardly breathe or get off the couch. The I let it consume me. I stopped getting up in the morning for my workout, and I stopped going for a swim in the evening when my husband got home. Things sucked royally.

My husband kicked me out of bed yesterday so that I would go run. It was the worst run I've done in several weeks, like back to the starting block bad. I cut my 5 mile run to 3.35 miles, and I walked several times. Ouch. I wasn't going to get out of bed this morning either. I told my husband "I just don't care anymore." He replied with "Then I will care enough for the both of us right now." While that may seem super sweet to most people(and admittedly, it is), it just pissed me off. I don't want him to care right now. I want to wallow in my own misery. I want to hide under the covers and cry. Like I've been doing for a few days. I know that I just need to go through the motions though. I don't HAVE to care right now. I don't HAVE to be bright and bubbly. I'm going through some tough sh** right now, it's not supposed to be easy. But, if I go through the motions, I will eventually care again. And I won't screw myself out of this amazing opportunity that I have to to do this half ironman. Which I've already paid for, so I better not waste that kind of money, they aren't cheap!

So, right now, I don't care. But, I am willing to go through the motions until I do care again.

20 weeks and counting!

Today marks the official start of the Boise Ironman 70.3 training. 20 weeks until race day. And I have a nasty cold and can hardly breath. And my husband has to go in to work today, on a Saturday. I feel defeated before it's even begun. That's all I've got. It can only get better from here.

5 miles

I ran 5 miles this morning, woo hoo! I took a new route this morning too. I had been running the same route, every single run. If I needed to add an extra mile, I just doubled back on the same route. BORING!! It was so nice an peaceful. It was very cloudy and windy this morning, but the clouds made the world almost silent. It was absolutely amazing.

I ran with my heartrate monitor, and kept my heartrate at around 150. I felt like i could run forever, and the best part is, I have never been sore after a run when I use this strategy. I had a good think this morning too. I reflected on the difference between this year and last year. I am 25lbs lighter this year, and my body is so much stronger. I remember barely being able to finish a mile this time last year, and now I am running five miles easily, though not very fast, but I'm fine with that. My body is so much stronger this year, and healthier. It's absolutely amazing! I cannot wait to see what this year has in store for me!

Heartrate Monitors, woo hoo!

So, I was talking with my brother the other day(he's done the Boise Ironman 70.3 three times, and a FULL Ironman too!) and he mentioned that he trained with a heartrate monitor this last time, and got his best time yet! So, I did some Googling(I don't know what I ever did without Google). I started running and cycling with a heartrate monitor and loosely following that kind of stuff last week. I've already seen an improvement! Honestly, it's not like I could get much worse, but it's so nice to see an improvement. It makes me happy.

This morning, I got up at 5:05am. Okay, I set my ALARM for 5:05am, and drug my tired butt out of bed at 5:2something. I finally hit the pavement at 5:45. I had been running 4 miles on my running days, but this morning, I set a goal for 5 miles! I did it! I even finished at a decent time too, faster than I thought I would. Granted, my lightning quick pace averaged out to be 12:$4/ mile by the end of my run, BUT that totally beats my time of 13:26/mile I did over 4 miles last week. AND I didn't feel dog tired at the end like I would when I ran without the heartrate monitor. The heartrate monitor helps to keep me from starting out too fast, and using all my energy before I'm done. Another good thing about today's run is that it is now 3:54pm, and I don't feel like I have jello legs! Usually if I go for a longer run, my legs are tired for the rest of the day and all I want to do it sit around. I feel GREAT today though, woo hoo!

I finally feel like I am making progress. I don't feel totally drained after my workouts, and I can workout longer and still feel good. I am losing weight, and losing inches. I went down a pant size, and I am even going to have to start wearing a belt with them soon. My swimming still has a LOT more room for improvement, but I am beginning to think I may just make the swim without being pulled out of the water for taking too long. 148 days laft.....

Running in the cold is....

COLD!! I felt like a polar bear this morning all bundled up in my winter running gear.


This is what I feel like when I run.....








But this is what others see.....
















The thing is, I don't care anymore. I used to be extremely self concious when I ran(and did anything else). I would only run in the dark, so passers by wouldn't see all the jiggle in my wiggle. Or the jaggle in my waggle. I've slowly become more comfortable with who I am though, and I know I am a good person. Who cares if I have an extra 10 pounds(okay, closer to 30) of extra fluff? If looks are that important, then you're not the kind of person I want to spend time with, and therefore your opinion is not allowed to intrude upon my life. Only positive thoughts and positive people are allowed, I have enough of my own negativity to want to add anymore from anyone else!

Now I'm committed.....

As if I wasn't before! Today, with 155 days remaining until the Boise Ironman 70.3, I finally bit the bullet and registered! I almost can't believe it. I am giddy with excitement.



I love the way that I can feel my body changing, becoming stronger, and leaner. I know that I've only been at this for 3 weeks, and that the uber serious training hasn't even started, but at an hour or more a day, it's made a huge difference, and it feels GOOD! Not only is my body improving, but so is my attitude. If you don't believe me, just ask my husband and kids! There is less yelling and sulking in the house, well, at least from me, the kids still have their moments!

I am a ninja

Most mothers are. This morning, I had to be particularly ninja-like though. The baby(as cute as she is), was awake on and off through the night, crying, tossing, and turning. While she didn't require my assistance, she was restless. I knew that when my alarm went off at 5:25 this morning, and she was already up crying, that it was going to be tough to sneak out of the house. Tough, but hopefully not impossible.

I was scheduled for a 4.1 mile run. I HAD to get it done. I am ashamed to admit that yesterday morning, I slept in. I pushed snooze once, then twice, then turned the damn thing off. I just couldn't drag myself out of bed. I haven't missed many of my early morning workouts, and it really throws me off when I do. Missing a morning workout means missing my alone time for the day. The time when I don't have to do anything for anyone else but myself. My time to be alone with my thoughts, my time for ME. I usually get to shower alone too, and occasionally I even get a cup of coffee halfway drunk and breakfast started. These are the mornings I cherish the most. I love to sit down at the table when the house is silent, and just sip my coffee(well, milk and sugar with a bit of coffee for flavor).

So, back to my ninja-like antics. The baby is sleeping in the den. She is an AWFUL sleeper, always has been. The only problem with her sleeping int he den, is that the den is right next to the front door. In other words, if I tried to sneak out the front door, I would be caught. I got dressed in the bathroom, and used my cellphone flashlight to tiptoe into the kitchen to get keys. My lovely husband had kindly suggested that I go out through the garage door, as to not awake the momentarily silent smallest kidlet. Because of the past few runs, where I totally hit a wall, I had decided that a cup of milk before my run would help(it did, yay!). That required passing the sleeping monster. Successfully accomplished though. I grabbed the keys(of course we keep them in a metal dish, which sounded 100 times louder in the silent house). I also managed to sneak up to the sen, and silently close the door. I hardly breathed as my hand touched the knob. Whew! Now, down the hallway, and out the garage door. I breathed a sigh of relief as I stuck the key in the knob to re lock the deadbolt, almost out safely. Out the side garage door I went, into the semi cloudy blackness of the night. Side door locked. I smiled. Mission accomplished. Out of the house without waking the baby. I turned on my Runkeeper app, and silently started my run, with the screams of an angry baby echoing in the distance. Thank goodness for such a supportive husband.

Entering New Territory

Oh yeah, that's right. I entered the 150's this morning, woot, woot!

I KNOW that I shouldn't depend upon my scale as much as I do. In fact, I have a mild obsession with it. I weigh in every morning. And every evening. And sometimes during the day. Yikes, that sounds worse than I make it out to be in my head. I may have some slight scale issues. But it feels so GOOD to see that number finally moving down! I feel like all of my hard work, and way too early mornings, are finally starting to pay off.

Ugh, speaking of early mornings, I slept in today. I felt so good, and yet so bad. I asked my husband to help me get out of bed, in fact, I asked him to kick me out of bed after my second alarm. I have to give him credit, he does a good job. He did just as I asked, but I told him to leave me alone, and that I would be up in just a minute. I promptly fell back asleep. And didn't wake up until I heard the morning cartoons come on when my almost 5 year old got up. Oops. I was supposed to ride the bike trainer out in the garage this morning. I AM going to make it to the pool this evening when my husband gets home though. I promise. I swear. I really do! I feel like celebrating my new lowest weight with a good swim. Strange, because I have never thought like this before. Celebrate with exercise? That's crazy talk! But maybe I am. Crazy that it. Some days, it sure feels like it!

159 Days

That might seem like a long time, but it's not. In fact, I am kind of freaking out about it. 159 days until the Boise Half Ironman. I have yet to register for it, that just seems like such a big commitment. It's one thing to SAY I'm going to do it, but it's another thing entirely to actually SIGN UP FOR the event! I will do it though, and by January 11th so that I don't' have to pay an increased fee. I'm just a procrastinator.

Every workout counts. Oh yeah, even with 159 days left, every single workout counts. I am sad when I miss a workout, or if my workout doesn't go as planned. I met with my trainer yesterday for what was supposed to be a swimming lesson. The pool was packed though, two people to a lane! So, we did weights instead. Don't get me wrong, I had a lot of fun, but I was still bummed about the pool. To make up for it, I did 65 minutes on the bike, and a speed workout on the treadmill. I still missed getting int he pool(wow, never thought I would say THAT!!). I am incredibly sore today form it all. BUT, I still got on the bike trainer in my garage this morning for a 39 minute ride. I watched part of the 2011 world championship triathlon though. Such an inspiration!

New Year, New Me!

Okay, here it is. The good, the bad, and the ugly......

I've got to start somewhere though. This is me, today, at 162lbs. It can only get better from here though, right? This year, I have goals. I am not making resolutions, I don't ever keep them. Instead, I am setting goals. So, here they are:
Goal #1: Boise Half Ironman on June 9th
Goal #2: Green River Triathlon, olympic distance, on June 30th
Goal #3: Swim, bike, or run 6 days a week(barring any sickness, vacation, etc)

Of course, in meeting these goals, I plan on achieving other things, such as weight loss, and becoming healthier, but those are just extra benefits in meeting my goals. I have a half ironman training plan, I just need to get it into my calendar to make sure that I am doing things on a proper timeline. At this point in time(and for the previous two weeks), I have been exercising twice a day, and doing two different sports in each day. I get up at 5:30 in the morning, and either run outside, or I jump on the bike trainer in the garage. This way, I can be done by 7, when my husband has to leave for work. When he gets home, I either go to the gym to swim, or else I run or bike again, whichever one I didn't do in the morning. I take Saturdays off(it's my husband's sleep in day, and day to get his long workout in), and on Sunday, I get to sleep in and do my long workout. Today, I met with my trainer at my local gym, and weighed in. We went over a few things in my training plan, and then went out and did some weight training for 40 minutes. After that, I did 65 minutes on the bike at the gym(15.67 miles), and then did some speed work on the treadmill(for 30 minutes(2 miles). My legs feel like jello now, but it's a great feeling!

Getting Started

I would like to say that this has been a long time in the making, but it hasn't. In fact, it's a fairly new idea to me, only coming about in the last few weeks. I am turning 30 on January 30th. 30. I don't know why, but this one is really getting to me. I accomplished a lot in this last year. Two half marathons(the Race to Robie Creek and See Jane Run), a sprint distance triathlon(the Women Rock Tri in Utah), a smaller Y-Not-Tri here in Boise, and also a Wonder Woman(30 mile) bike ride back down in Utah. That's a LOT! Especially considering just how out of shape I am. So, I felt like I needed something to really kick my butt. And kicked it will be. I am determined to complete the Boise Half Ironman on June 9, 2012. Yup, you read that right. I want to become a HalfIronMom, and this is my journey!